Day 25: Choices and Voices

How many choices do you make throughout the day? Beyond just food, or the shirt you put on in the morning; more than the time you walk out the door or whether you stop for breakfast; bigger than the dollar you give to the sad-faced man sitting with all of his belongings. Choice. Choices. We make countless decisions each day. We decide to do one thing or another. Choices can be simple, like picking up a stray piece of trash, or monumental. All choices lead to one of two outcomes; it's either yes or no. "Maybe" eventually tilts to either side. And though you can have 50 choices for a given situation, you still say yes to some and no to others. Why is it that some choices are so hard to make? How can a choice cause so much strain? When do certain choices become easier?

I've been struggling with the idea of choice for some time. Simple things like sharing stories or news can become huge decisions. All the voices that push to be heard make any decision so layered. I seem to always have 5 different voices weighing in on my choices. The voice that thinks about what I need is in a thunder-dome-style battle with the erratic "I want" voice. There are all the social voices, too. The ones that tell you one thing is better than another because it is more popular or less awkward. Maybe the choice is just less confrontational, less radical or less problematic. We have the voices that weigh in for our friends and families, all the voices that have shaped our thought patterns and our social interactions. We have the insecure voices that whisper timidly, but seem to carve out the most space. It's a surprise there's any room left in our mind for stillness. peace. quiet. calm. Not emptiness, but clarity. That's what I'm searching for.

The more I practice yoga, the more peaceful I am. I can find longer moments of stillness; clarity in thought isn't a struggle. All the voices that compete for my attention and lead to so much stress are quieting down. I'm becoming more in tune with my real needs, hearing my body's requests and acting on each in turn. And it is terribly refreshing. Magical, even. So much introspection - an hour and a half each day - is changing my perspective; I'm focusing more on my true desires; what will really make me happy; what I really need at each moment.

"You work on it; it's a practice. It's yoga, so have fun with it," Mechelle says to all the new students. It's calming, the voice she uses. It's light, yet focused. Not intimidating, but inviting. This is the type of voice we should carry with us. The voice that reminds us that yoga, work, school, and life are all just long practice sessions.  We are moving, growing, progressing. And that's beautiful.

So quiet down all those competing voices. Try listening to your own body, your own spirit; the one that truly belongs to you. It can be surprising, and wonderfully freeing, to follow that voice. Your true voice. Voice. Choice. Rhyming. Fun.